just fine-ness

so, i am fine. just fine. i haven't had much to say as of late because there has just been a lot of overwhelming "stuff" going on. and it is nothing i can pin point. nothing i can come right out and say, it just is. just. is.

there is a mountain of topsoil in my yard just waiting to be moved and tilled and mixed in with our delightful composted goodness...and i am just over the moon about getting my garden up and running.

not gonna lie though, it has been a tough couple weeks, and i think i may have to chalk some of it up to the fact that benji stopped nursing, and though he was ready, and i think i was, it was a realization in the fact that there will be no more nursing, no more itty bitty wee beans here...a new stage...that could make a gal hormonal no?


i know that things are looking up a bit though, because two days ago this would have sent me into a tailspin....





















project for you all....

please hit me up with a comment and let me know your single MOST favorite bbq dish....this is uber important, so suck it up and leave a comment....

hmmm....

the beans are good. the wedding was fun, we had a fabulous time though i missed the children tremendously.

my grandmother is doing great.

a happy belated mothers day to all you mama's out there.
















things are in order.






























however, i am in a heck of a mood, so, as we were told as little children, if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all.

i won't.

post tomorrow. i promise. there is 20 yds of topsoil being delivered today for my garden. this will help me get out of this funk. i promise.

i simply am shocked that thursday is here already. this past weekend was so delightful and jam packed that i have been slowly recouping ever since.
there were moments i felt so tired from all the go go going, and moments i felt so loved and so lucky to have such wonderful people all in my home, with my family...sharing such a wonderful day. and moments i felt sad because some special folks couldn't be with us.
there has been massive quantities of time spent playing with new toys, and treats. big bags of recycled old ones leaving the house.
tons of reprogramming of little minds to re-adjust to quiet- calm- normalcy.
there was a thirtieth birthday for hubs gasp! 30. a 5th year for the biggest bean and a 3rd for the princess...imagine.
there is thriving basil and thyme, there are beautiful planters full of spring goodness.
there is a garden calling my name to be tilled and planted and loved up on...

it's all good. all good. sigh....all good.

i feel like i am in a sleepy life induced state of goodness.


right now i feel like my life with these little beans can be summed up like this.
i have an amazing man, who loves and takes tremendous care of us all.
we have three very special little beans,
and a house that holds us all. our little house is infested with lady bugs, really infested. like think arachnophobia but lady bug style. and though we open the windows and shoo them out, some linger, and make their way about the house.

the biggest bean, he collects them. will spend hours watching them, take them to school in his little big cage, then leave them in the car so they roast in the sun.

the middle bean, she calls them her "little lady friends" and names them, but when something better comes her way, she doesn't look back.

the benji bean...he eats them. enough said.



all i can leave you with today, is a quiet
namaste...

amidst the noise...

there has been lots of good. today i made my first trip of the season to the local garden place to marinate in all the plants and flowers and herbs and goodness. i'll tell yah, it was exactly what i needed. exactly. i needed to see all the fresh, natural, gorgeous plants just calling to me to bring them home and place them into our family...so, i did....but i am already planing a return trip later this week.















it was such a treat. the kidlets were in tow, and actually love the place as much as i do, and it just makes it all that much more special...


otherwise things have been status quo here.

there has been moonlit playscaping...



















wearing our boots in the 80 degree sun because our feet are "fricken' filthy"















there has been snack dates and lunch trips and all sorts of spring goodness....











click on this pic and look in the cup...you must...


















the big man started soccer, and though i have no pics yet, as bry was working late and it was just me to wrestle with the brood, i will relay this tale...oh how i wish i had my camera handy.

toward the end of a fun practice, the coach decided that the kids would do a little scrimage. he had 6 of the children 5 boys and a girl stand in a circle around the ball, and he gave the instruction that when he blew the whistle, the children were to go after the ball and dribble it to the goal, and of course shoot. well, coach blew the whistle, and for a solid minute all 6 children stood still. not a movement. blank stares. then, the little girl, kicked the ball, took charge, and dribbled all the way to the goal. all the while, the 5 little boys, one being myles, stood still. just watching with blank stares. it was AMAZING.

i whole heartedly PROMISE to photograph next weeks practice.


happy spring y'all....

*and also, if you get a chance, send some prayers and positive our way, my grandmother is having a rough go, and we are desperately wishing her well again....love you gram...

*un-inspired*

feeling un into blogville lately.

maybe because the weather has warmed and we are just loving it up. maybe because so much other chaos is happening. not really sure why.

there is just. so. much. going. on.

everyone is good though. everything is good.


hubs is desperately trying to get the new play scape up. i am watching and anticipating. if you are nearby and feel like strapping on a tool belt...i will cook dinner and toss some beers out to you. thanks to pa and david who helped get the project underway...

we are now on step 78 of 126. so really....i'll cook....

at any rate.

not much else going on...just busily trying to ready this house for upcoming goodness...














*are any of you still here? what's happening in your worlds?

spring things

in our backyard there is a mama fox, who lives in her den with nine or so little beans of her own. they scurry in and out of the big hole in the ground, and nurse and play and dance around. it is a lot like the inside of our den i think.

but i find myself drawn outside to the deck for hours at a time these days just to watch all the lovins.


*if you click on the pic to make it bigger you can see the mama and a few of the little ones.

the weather has finally turned, and i feel like with this comes a sense of renewal and peace that is much needed. the kiddos spend the majority of the day outside, and i feel like finally some of the cobwebs in my mind are clearing out a bit too. we have the windows all open and the little germs and winter bugs are free to go.


































benji is doing well, though still trying to convince me not to stop nursing. he thinks that the more of a terror he is, then the more apt i will be to realize that all i need to do is walk around with him attached to my boob at all times than he will not pull all this nonsense. no dice little man. no dice. and M just wants to be extra. super. positive. that we all know he is not at all responsible for anything this child does. at all. ever.















hubs is working double overtime to get the yard and the new play scape ready for the children, as it was a big purchase for their birthdays. so, we have been running lots of errands, renting heavy equipment and just bustling around. T is a trooper, trying her very best to not have any accidents now that she is primarily in "big gale underwares." Yesterday on a routine trip to Home Depot, T spoke up from the back of the truck with a
"daddy i feel pee-pees"

and hubs quickly responded with a "okay T, we will be there in a minute,"

"BUT DADDY, I FEEEEEEEL PEE-PEEES NOWWWWW.

"Ok T, we will bet there in one minute, you need to hold your pee-pees."

then a horrified....

"But Daddy, We don't touch our pee-pees. MOMMMMMMMYYYYYY daddy told me to hold my pee-pees, we don't touch pee-pees, they are dirty, i don't wanna hold my pee-pees, ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. i wanna use a potty NOW mommy, take me to a potty PLEASE."

ah, the injustice of it all. as if. really.

at any rate, my garden is being moved and going to be two and half times the size, and i stinkin' cannot wait. i actually can't sleep at night i am so excited. so, spring is here, and lots of good things are in the making. t is turning 3, m is turning 5, and hubs is turning 30. i am busily researching his new gift....and how to make it work/get it here/pay for it etc. should be fun...

* oh, and congrats to Eric and Erin, who's new bean was born last week, Aislinn Elaine...you can see her beautiful face here. we are waiting for her to come home from the hospital, but so far so good. keep her in your thoughts that she continues to do well, and gets to come home to her beautiful family in no time at all.

and also to Camp and Brooke who's special little lady was born last week as well, Shennen Ella whom we cannot wait to meet also!

hug, love and spring sunshine to you all,

xo,

A

*also, anybody familiar with the tunes of joe purdy?

catching up...

benjiville is kicking my arse. the child is climbing like it is his job. if you turn your head for even a moment, he is on top of the fridge with a handful of grapes and firing them at you with a salad shooter. so in light of the fact than my kid is all over the place, and won't stay out of the dog food long enough for me to type a quick post, i thought i would take advantage of nap time today, as the kid is actually sleeping

things here have been good, crazy busy and at a constant spin, but good. we have been
running around, birthday parties being planned, doing errands, making syrup. (yes, AGAIN), visiting with sister from seattle, visiting with friends, trying to suck the life out of every moment that is warm enough to play outside, working at the store, and marinating in life.















we are anxiously awaiting two new beans to the list of treasures around here, one, who should be crowning as we speak, a little giannelli and the other whom is over a week late, but a foley, so we will forgive the lateness, as it is part of their genetic make-up...

the beans here are well, everyone is antsy, as it just seems like the winter has been dragging on. we are itchy to get out and play, there are bikes to be ridden, seeds to be planted, and gardens to be loved up. so in the meantime, there has been a whole boat load of whining from the princess - and if you have never witnessed this, my god. i am trying to keep things in perspective here, but i sometime think i might fare better if i gauged my ears out with a toothbrush, a whole lot of tormenting from the big bean, and just a mess of chasing the little guy around.















m has decided that he is too busy to play anymore, and can only "work."
and poor misguided T, keeps telling him that she would like to play with him "when pigs fly."

the new game here is pretend, which t calls "by-tending," so m will pretend that his room is a zoo, and the way he cleans, it's not the far fetched really...and t "by-tends" her room is a wazzam, which translates in t speak to MUSEUM....

so, she will run in to our room at the ass crack of dawn and tell you, "you won't believe it, but is is good morning time in my WAZAAM....." and i roll over and look at the clock, and remind bry that if he doesn't put the shade back onto her window, she is just going to keep doing this, i can't fool her to sleep past 6:30 if she can see the daylight.

and the littlest bean, well, aside from being a nursing fool, and just a little bit of a terror, well, he is just such a little pumpkin. when he looks up and smiles at me, well, i think that my heart just melts a bit...he knows how to kiss, and cuddle and i think i just am totally in love with his little self.




















oh, and the store GRAND OPENING, was yesterday, there was lots of folks there to hang and join in on the goodness, and i was so pleased that so many of the good peeps where around to show their support...















anyhow, hope you and yours are all doing great...
xo,

A

seriously.

i went up to check on the kids on tuesday night....
found M asleep wearing his boxers like a hat.
















there really are no words....




xo,

A

sunday, sunday

i feel like the anti-blogger. blogging has put me in a bit of a spot lately, and as a result, i have lost some momentum out here in my little corner of bloggyville. so, before i jump back on the horse, let me clarify a few things.

for starters, if i have ever suggested that you check out a pic on the site, it is not meant to deter you from seeing us in "real" life. it is just merely a "hey, check out the pic!" we still would love to see you. i am not saying you can't come hang, so you might as well just read the blog. i mean really. c'mon now.

there are people that read this, and see the kids everyday. i simply cannot, and will not call everyone i know and relay what goes on day to day, everyday.

for seconds, if i have not called you lately, it is because benji is holding me hostage. we had three phones last week, and as of tonight, we are down to one. the first he pulled the wires out of, and the second he sunk in the dog bowl. the caller i.d window actually has enough water in it that some sea monkeys would probably thive and be able to mate. so, i am down to one cordless phone that is 10 years old, and if it is not charged, well, your shit out of luck.

and lastly, cut me some slack, the kid never stops. this week, he ate yellow play-doh, alot of it, stuck his head in the cat door, locked himself IN the big ass fireplace enclosure(the fireplace was not going, so put down the phone - and really, did you not just read the above mentioned section about me only having ONE phone- it is probably not charged), and nursed for an ungodly amount of hours - still working on that. now if you give him a sippy cup, he goes directly to the trash and throws it out. and the dog food and water have been permanently moved to the counter, as i can only do so much laundry. really. no rest here. at all. he just wants to ensure that i am way too tired to have any more kids, and i just keep trying to reassure him that he can lay off because daddy's urologist already took care of that. no dice.

















*not gonna lie, the kid was happy in there, and i did not rush to get him...

at any rate, kids are still workin' a bit of a head cold, and i am just trying to power through to warm weather. DESPERATELY. i am yearning for days in the warm sun, gardening, walks around the neighborhood, gardening, playing outside, and gardening more. the kiddos too i think are getting antsy. there has been lots of in the house time, which is really tough, and often leads chaos here.

















*heard and seen the last few days....


T woke up, came downstairs, walked directly into the wall and fell over...promptly stood up and yelled "YOUR AND IDIOT WALL."

not sure where that came from...i use a lot of choice words, but idiot? not one of them.

M has been really trying to get his feelings across, and when you say something that rubs him the wrong way he will yell that you are INORING him, which doubles for annoying in little man speak. he is going to kindergarten soon, maybe they will set him straight.

and the little guy has chosen "garbage," as his word of choice. i should only be so lucky.

there is lots of little people talk,

such as T:"i'm weally disappointed myles,"
and M : "that's too bad, maybe you should have yistend"

and T

"Daddy PICK ME UP"

"I am trying to do something, you have to wait."

"Daddy pick me up NOW"

"I am in the middle of something, please wait."

"Daddy, you have FIVE minutes to pick me up...."


honestly....














all of course is sandwiched between hugs, and smooches and i love you mama's. i simply cannot get past the way that the older two play. they lay out blankets on the floor and pretend to nap, and chat with each other, and have all sorts of amazing little conversations. the very best of friends most days.

and lastly a few store pics, as the work continues...but i'll take it is a good sign when pa calls to check in at the end of the day and says, "it was a madhouse today..."















*the fun lil open sign i slaved away on...















*the folks opening day - how stinkin' cute are they?
















*hubs building the sign in the shop

happy spring, happy easter, happy sunday to y'all....if any of you are still out there...

xo,

A

sick.

sorry no updates. kids are sick. the two littlest beans have been sick all week with the usual winter stuff, boogers and such, but M came home from a playdate today, spiked a fever, than opted to go to bed. should be a fun one.

peace, love, and health food.

breathing in....now out....ahhhhh.....it's sunday. hubs and i rolled out of bed with kidlets in tow, ate breakfast, and now he is gonna work on a few more projects, and me and the beans are gonna do some errands.

i apologize for the blogging vaca, and the utter and complete lack of updates. i honestly feel like we have never been so crazy busy ever. the store has been great. so great in fact, that we have been spending WHOLE days there. truly, i have asked the children repeatedly if they are ready to go home yet, and i am met with total resistance every time. they all think that they run the place, and M has taken to giving whatever small child walks in a tour, just like he has been watching his mimi and pa do. it is freakin' adorable.

the days have been long, so long, but they go by in the blink of an eye. we have been visiting with friends that stop by and shop, and chat, and eat, and taken in all the loveliness...and we so do love those visits. all of you that have taken the time to come by...it means the world. we know how busy everyone is, but it is just so sweet!

T has spent hours and hours at the store, and has found a million and one things to do to keep herself all sorts of occupied. she colors, she hops all around the store, she brings all her little babies with her and puts them down for naps in the shopping baskets...which i finally talked her into keeping behind the counter, rather than in the aisles, as it was a bit creepy.

and the little guy, well, he is just a terror. but the sweetest little terror that there ever was.

all three greet every customer with a smile and a few end up with a story to boot, which nobody seems to mind. the customers too have been wonderful, and it is so fabulous to hear all the excitement and joy that fills the air, as people walk in almost jumping about how excited they are to have a health food store in the area. it is neat. and all the celiac folks that come in are simply overjoyed. yesterday i sold cookies to a woman who had not had a cookie in 3 years. yup, three. my mom gives 'em the "celiac tour," and we have had already a handful of repeat customers...so great.


at any rate, i'll stop ranting about the store, and just say, that i am so thrilled about where things are...the week has been chock full of togetherness, family time, gathering, trying new things, savoring old ones, meeting new peeps..., and learning, learning, learning. i has been such a wonderful experience helping the folks start this venture, and watching it evolve after so much time in the works.

other than store stuff, we are simply just waiting for the warm weather to grace us so we can play, garden and thrive in the sun....you???




i hope you are all wonderful....

xo, A

at the arrival gate...

*embrace*balance*sustain*heal*grow*

so peeps, it's finally here. hubs will be working through the evening to put the finishing touches on things, and i will be tweaking a few small things, as i am sure the folks are doing on their end of things as well, but more or less. it's done.

tomorrow Nature's Grocer will open it's doors. please send well wishes and positive prosperous vibes our way!




























i am all set for things to get settled, as are the beans, who i must say, have been such absolute troopers through this whole process. there have been minimal time outs. just a few meltdowns, and so many late nights and stressful shuffling of beans to keep things moving. overall...it was smooth. but i am ready for normalcy, whatever that means. i guess it means i will be able to go back to scraping crayons out from under the heaters. awesome.























a huge thanks on my end to all of you that have helped me with the kidlets these last few weeks and days, especially Sheryl for being able and willing to watch everyone and do the shuffling back and forth from preschool....it's been huge.



















at any rate, best of luck to the folks, i will be there as much as possible the next several days, so stop over, have a cup of coffee, say hey, and shop lots!

namaste,

A

it's really happening.

i remember as a child, having kids in my class whose families owned restaurants, bakeries, stores, etc, and always wishing that my family had a place like that. a place we could go and work....and enjoy. I think the majority of this wishing was done while i was out applying for one lame job or another, and i had all these friends that didn't have to do it. they could roll out of bed, drive down to their folks place and hang out...

so, while there is very little "hanging - out" that goes on, and a hell of a lot of work, i must say, that i am so damn proud of these guys. the store is on the cusp of opening, and looks like it will be tuesday of next week. the shelves are mostly stocked the folks are doing great, working hard, and keeping cool about it all the while. it is taking shape. i honestly couldn't be prouder of them or happier for them. i so heart walking up and down each aisle and marinating in each and every product filling it's own little place on the shelf, and knowing that while it is weeks of hard work that have filled these aisles, it's a lifetime of their hard work that has brought them to the place that they are now.

it. is. amazing.















we have been running lots of errands, trying to be as helpful as we can with 3 beans that are desperately awaiting spring - lots of creativity i tell yah...there has been train building with some of the MILLION boxes that have been unpacked, stacking of foods, sweeping of papers and building ramps for little trucks and stuff. that said, the beans have been tremendous....T even did a seven hour day at the store with not one meltdown....sweet.















and the biggest bean, he just wants to help. but on his terms of course......















benji is less easy to work with, as he is simply into everything. and i really mean everything. he wants to run, explore, climb, play, climb, oh - and nurse at the same time. fun. stocking shelves with a baby at the hip, now that is where it's at. the child spends the vast majority of his day stuffing things into places that they don't belong. in turn, i spend much of my day scraping melted crayon drippings from under the baseboard heaters, trying to get cars out from under the stove or diapers out of the laundry. this morning i said, "benji go get your SHOES..." "SHOES benji SHOES." so he promptly took off to the garbage pail in the hallway and started banging on it. i picked him up and moved him, and i shook my head and said "NO GARBAGE benji NO. now go find your SHOOOOOOOES. got it benj? SHOOOOOESSSSS."

he smiled and took off again, laughing all the way to the garbage can which i am forever telling him to get away from. again banging on the pail. so, again i did the whole "no benji that's yucky no touch" thing. again moved him away from the pail.

again "SHOEEEEEEES benji....."

again, the damn pail. so just for kicks, i picked the kid up, and opened the pail to show him, garbage is yucky....and we don't touch. and alas, i am the asshole, because there in the pail, where his two little blue crocs, just hangin' out happy as pie.

will wonders never cease.


hugs all,

*A*


p.s. nins, thanks for the sweet post, and the kidlets v-day surprise, they were tickled....you rock my world lady...

taking stock...

feeling a bit under the weather today with a cough and head thing going on. out in the world, the snow is melting, the yard looks like hell, and the shelf stocking is under way, while i am here, waiting for the sitter to come help out with the kiddos so i can work, work, work.

things are crazed, and as a result everyone is run down...just cannot wait for spring. really cannot wait.


went to the best EVER baby shower on Sunday night, really props to the Mama who planned it, you should DEFINITELY leave your career and be a party planner. it was top notch. I am usually so not a fan of showers, and it rocked. no, really, it did.

for gifting purposes, though i took no pics, i made a bib, that matched a super soft yummy quilt, and even decked out a simple gift bag by sewing on some pretty simple buttons....

it was fun, though i think there were lots of handmade blankies there, i guess the more homemade lovins the better right???



alright all, T just kicked me in the shin which must mean she needs me.
sitter on the way, so i am gonna go feed the peeps lunch and drink some tea for me...

hugs, and well wishes all.

xo,

A

a confession, and some snow...

hey y'all.

feel like i need to anti-up here, and share with the world wide web, that while it was a chaotic thing, hubs made the best. damn. syrup. uhm, ever. kidlets had it today with pancakes, and i went off my strike to take a taste, and holy sh*t, the man makes some bombin' maple syrup. so, alas, my apologies. it was good, you were right, i jumped the gun, shouldn't have freaked out, yada yada. M says it is sweet and yummy, and even sticky. great.









































at any rate, all else is status quo. thought we were done with winter here. but not so much. so, we are spending lots of time hanging today. i have been crafting my brains out, putting the finishing touches on a gift for some dear friends baby shower tomorrow, sorry brooke, i am not posting ANY pics, so you can keep reading. finishing projects that i have going on for the store, (that is set to open on March 10th,) so keep your eyes open, more will be coming on that front...
the beans are fab, lots of sass, giggles and destruction going on but hey, that is what it is all about right? i do feel as though i spend an insane amount of time lately picking up. i will give myself a goal, just pick up the mudroom, and don't worry about the rest, and while i am in the mudroom cleaning, the littlest bean will write all over the tv with T's crayons, and the biggest bean will be "building picture frames" with household items, and T, well, she just creates a monumental MESS wherever she goes. she has also informed me today that we don't need to worry about the potty for the rest of the day, as her bum is closed for the rest of the day. awesome, that will free up some of my day for sure.













Today's current disaster that is in the process of being dealt with, is the hot chocolate that hubs gave the 4 year old, IN A MUG, ON THE COUCH. use your imagination really. so, the seat cover went straight to the wash, and i asked hubs, WHY WHY WHY, would you give him hot CHOCOLATE in a HEAVY ceramic MUG, ON THE COUCH.

to which he responded, "you told me he doesn't drink out of sippy cups anymore."

thinking this would clearly make him see my point, i said, "would you give him chocolate ice cream with hot fudge sauce, in a bowl- on the COUCH?"

"yeah, why?"

never mind really.















so the long and short, are that things are a bit hectic. we have been doing a whole lot of here there and everywhere for all sorts o' projects and what not, some store related, others not so much. i have been trying to gym it - every opportunity i get, which i find helps me tremendously. in every way.

knitting has taken a back seat till sewing and decoupaging and all the other jazz is completed....

hubs is working like crazy to complete his store things like checkout counters, coffee stations, etc. just lots to do. LOTS.

JUST.CAN'T.WAIT.TILL.STORE.IS.OPEN.....

*also, looking for some inspiring new dinner options, any ideas?