a new day.

so, exciting things are happening....these are times of change, and i am so excited to be part of them....so excited that my peeps are part of them....

last night during thankful, myles declared that he is thankful for Barack Obama being the next president...good work myles, i think i was 18 or 19 before i gave a shit.

at any rate...here has been rough...the biggest bean was down with a TERRIBLE virus...one with 104.5 temp, for close to 8 days. amazing...he just sat on the couch with his eyes closed - it was so sad....so so sad.

but it passed. and now...

T has it.

horrible. she is a bundle of fever and blankies and MESS.











and benji scaling the walls and throwing things at all the children....fun.





he is always into something, and cannot be left to his own devices. ever. period.

haven't left the house in 3 days. except to vote...

xo, A

happy halloween

hope your day is filled full of sweet things...

mine sure is!

xo,
A

official.

so, it's official.

i am thirty. seriously, i know age is just a number...but it is kinda nutty i think....

oh well. trying to keep things in perspective. i have amazing people in my life, that keep my world rockin'. i have a tremendous extended family whom i cherish. all that helped make the transition to 30 way easy. and, it is fall - that makes everything better - the smell of the woodstove, the noise of the leaves crunching as the kids run through the yard - amazing. i just love fall, as it is me. fall is me. i am fall.

there are other very official things going on. i am officially done having children, i begged hubs to make a return trip to the urologist, not gonna happen. but we may be adding a new pup...bax needs a pal too right?? this is in the works...shhhh....(the dog, not the urologist.)

m is officially terrified to take the training wheels of his bike...it is ridiculous...

benji is officially no longer a baby...he is gonna be two is february people, seriously. benji....wow.

t is officially awesome....example - yesterday am, bry and i were laying in bed trying to put off getting up, being that it was 6 am and sunday...i know right??

here was the conversation - M - "t, i am going to be a robot for halloween, and i am gonna scare you right out of our city"

T-"you can try myles, but i am gonna be teagan the brave witch, and i am not scared of you. besides, i am way braver than you anyways. can you go clean my room."

M- "uhm, okay i guess so."

T "thanks, i am gonna go rest while you do that."

UH hi, she's freakin' THREE....


and as mentioned earlier, it is officially fall. you would know that if you came to my house because the children, though normally very coordinated, fall down a lot, as it takes them about one month to adjust to the whole socks on wood floors thing.

what's up with you? and do tell, what is your favorite fall tradition? i am curious....

updates

hey all. i know i know i know....my bad. i have been unable to blog for a laundry list of reasons...

so....here are a few.

1. i temporarily forgot my blogger password...uh, lame right? but remembered it this morning...so all set now.

2. i have been unable to stop following the sarah palin nonsense long enough to sit down and blog...but now that she has done her debate - and i have picked my jaw up off the floor...well, i am ready to blog again.

3. the biggest bean is acting like a pms'ed 15 year old child...uh, yeah, i am serious. this is problematic because
a. it does not allow me to maximize my pms.
and
b. because it makes me want to drop him off at the post office and make him hang out with the jackass who works there that is so freakin' mean i go to the other post office down the street...

4. i was waiting for the bills to lose so my mohawked husband would shave already. they did. he did. we can go back to functioning like a non-rednecked family... and i can stop calling him "joe six pack." (thanks sarah! that was so clever!!)

5. i was afraid sarah p. may try to get my blog banned, along with the other nonsense books that she has tried to ban...amongst them - into the night kitchen by maurice sendak. A. MAZE. ING.

6. wasn't sure anybody actually read this anymore...

7. was stressing about turning 30 momentarily...when, when, when, did i get that old? i mean 30 people. what the hell. i think my parents are only like 42...WHAT???????????

8. all children have a disgusting SNOT filled germ infested cold. two days ago princess T climbed up on the bed and coughed INTO my mouth while i was sleeping...not only woke me up, but also gave me a wicked case of the germies. great.

9. have been working on the soccer mom thing. actually told m i would give him a dollar if he touched the ball AT ALL at soccer practice. he did. and then he more or less YELLED across the field, " MA - can i get my dollar NOW or later?? i kicked it, did you see?? " and then for anyone who didn't catch it the first time, he followed up with a "DO I GET A DOLLAR EVERY TIME I KICK THE BALL OR ONLY THE FIRST TIME?"

BIG. GOLD. STAR. FOR. ME.

10. oh, and i went back to work. where i am so busy trying to fit everything in (read - look busy)....i started a knitting club with my fifth grade girls at recess - sneaky right?? they love it, and i get to KNIT during work - and be paid for it....;)

11. was busy being a maverick....wait WHAT?

12. was busy explaining to T that just because benji didn't cry, does NOT mean it was OKAY to hit him in the head and push him down...



so, lots of excuses...i am back though. it's fall, my favorite, i am ready to rock it all fall style and dance around the kitchen filling everybody's snot sticky faces with apple crisp and home made soup lovin's....

xoxox,

A

what are you all doing....besides of course getting ready to VOTE. or else.

hmm.

hi. uhm, happy fall.

so sorry for the lack of posts...it is not that i have been too busy, just i have been too busy to blog.

we are savoring fall,
making sauce with the last of the tomatoes,
feeling the cool crisp amazing green grass in between our toes,
practicing soccer - A LOT,
learning,
agonizing over sarah palin and her world all chock full of nonsense,
reading new library books all covered in crinkley plastic book covers,
scheming about halloween plans and make it yourself costumes,
wondering when husband will get rid of his mohawk,
enjoying the cool breezes,
trying to decipher the myths and facts that come home with kindergartners after school(i cannot even formulate these stories to explain right now, but i will. i promise, i will.)
sipping tasty red wine on the deck at night wrapped in cozy wool sweaters,
prepping myself to take on fall and all my fallish recipes with gluten-free passion,
just alot. mosty good, but alot.
...














this of course is all amidst me running back to work here and there, visits to the gym, kindergarten life (and attitudes) and preschool stuffs...

so, while all is wonderful, it's also just a bunch of crazy.













what are you doing...? say hi....i would love to hear from all of yah...

my "sort of" problem.

(me and my girly....)













life has finally slowed down long enough for me to post...but i am now so backdated on updates it is so ridiculous.

so i will just do a brief synopsis.
















the biggest bean - loved kindergarten, but is HORRIFIED that they only work, and don't get any time to play. he tells me his gym teacher's name is JIM, and that his art teacher is just a touch taller than teags. i will get back to you on this after open house.

on the first day, we went out to the bus too early, and it was a disaster. over anxious i guess. but we waited an hour.

this was a problem for two reasons.

1. i almost put him on the middle school bus. it stopped, what would you have done? how was i supposed to know, but the driver kindly informed me that's why they tell you to come out of the house at 8, not 7:30....uh, my bad.

2. the septic across the street being pumped for 45 minutes. unreal smell. M told me his backpack died. great. but we could not go inside, as i would MAKE him MISS his bus, and hence RUIN the rest of his adult life.















the first day off the bus he looked like a train wreck, but we are getting there.







benji just waves a lot, as now there is ALWAYS somebody leaving or arriving....he waves alot.










the wedding was fab, i have very few pics of this, but will post the link to my pal eric's site as soon as he gets some up.






























the middle bean started pre-school, and is rockin' it, though i must say, about half the class was screaming children clinging to their parents more or less BEGGING them to pulllease not feed them to the wild monkeys...it was sort of unreal. but she was a champ.














(this is her with Sam, a close friends' son, whom she is planning on marrying. they are planning on living in separate homes, and driving a snow plow together for a living. they are also planning on getting their children from the kid store. really. i kid you not.)



and now, this.















it was a big. stupid. horrible. idea.


M thinks that mohawks are really ultra hot. so, i told him, that if he picked up the playroom, (which for the record, i would have made him do ANYWAY,) i would give daddy, a mohawk. A TEMPORARY HA HA 2 HOUR MOHAWK. (i was going to shave hubs head last night anyway.) it was supposed to last A NIGHT.

so, fast forward to one day later.
mohawk still here.
me, so mad.
THEN,
his stinkin' buffalo bills win a game. AS. IF.
like for the first time in - uhm ever, i think.

so, dear hubs....thinks/convinces himself, that he now must KEEP his mohawk, until they lose, because alas folks, it is now a good luck thing. WHATTT.

you are going to have to pray for me. kindergarten open house is in two days. seriously people...look out your windows, and you may actually see my head BLOW up from wherever you are.

on kindergarten

Dear Little Big Man,

I am about to go and wake you up and get you ready for your first big day out there without mum. I am so nervous and excited for you all at once. Kindergarten. WOW. I cannot believe this is even happening. I have so many hopes and dreams for you, and i am so hoping that you love school and that this is a wonderful experience.

I am going to restrain myself today from being the mom that follows the bus waving frantically, and though i will probably shed a few tears today, it is because i am so sad that our home days are over, but it is time for you to go out into the world...and make trouble somewhere else. I hope that all the children are kind, and know always we love you SOOOO much.

I will apologize now for not allowing you to wear you tie today. I know you really want to, but i am afraid that some fifth grader will make you feel like this is uncool , or choke you with it, and i love this quirk about you so much, that you are going to have to trust me when i tell you that they don't wear ties at school. If when you are in 8th grade you still want to wear this tie, i promise i will give you the go ahead.

i love you biggest bean, good luck today.

xo, mom

this is where i find him every morning after breakfast.













so, today i followed the morning routine, and "tracked" him, to see WHAT HIS DEAL IS.








































































so, my findings...

this is what happens every morning when i tell the other two it is time to brush their teeth.

this is also the reason i have not been able to post.

really hoping the baby sitters can hack it when i go back to work.


things are insane here. starting next week, my head may actually explode. i go back to work on monday(for the first time in almost 2 years)M starts kindergarten on wed. and t starts school the following thursday. rehearsal dinner friday, sister getting married saturday....and, and, and.
plus, add benji to the mix...yes, my head will definitely explode...

it is amazing. the whole world works. i am going back to work for 2 and a half days, yes people...it's like 12 days a month. and i think the WHOLE WORLD is going to STOP functioning properly. amazing. i probably just need to get over myself, and let things fall into place...but i am so so overwhelmed.

amidst the chaos and whirlwinds of the household, i am trying desperately to enjoy every moment of sunshine, every little conversation and thought, and every hour of each day.

last night, after baths, while i was brushing t's hair, this conversation took place:

me: "t. are you excited that you get to be in auntie chelsea's wedding soon?"

t: (jumping and pointing at the sky)" yesssss i am, i am a flowahh gale"

me: "do you know what your job is as a FLOWER GIRL?"

t: "yesssss, i am gonna walk down the aisle and carry flowahs, then when i get to auntie chelsea, i am gonna throw them at her. "

excellent. this is going to be a BLAST.
















miss you all, and thanks so much for all your kindness, after the passing of my grams...


xo,

A

rest.

(my grams, bertha spector - the most recent pic i have seen.)
gram,

i lost you today.

the sadness is coming in waves...

i am desperately trying to keep my head on straight and let things sink in. i do okay for a minute here or there, but when i need to say out loud that your gone...well, that is a whole different ball game.

you were such am amazing woman. i just cannot even formulate my thoughts. there is sadness, anger, grief, and overall relief that your suffering is over...and mixed in, there is a whole lot of raw emotion...that i just don't know what to do with. right now i just feel blah. all day your amazing laugh has been echoing in my mind, the jingle of your silver alert bracelet and all your little mannerisms.

though i do not know where my mind will run to today and everyday with out you after this, i know that you loved this blog so much because of the pics of the kiddos and the updates and stories...so here is where i have turned...to think, about you.

Myles played with his Hess truck all day yesterday...and i gave him your special kisses just as you requested. I know he will remember you so vividly as he grows, as i was almost exactly his age when poppy died. i passed along kisses to all your "babies," this afternoon, as i told them of your passing...Myles says you were a special lady. i couldn't agree more. i promise to keep kissing these babies for you, for a long time to come.

thank you so much for spending time with me this week. i know it was hard. for letting me look into your eyes...for smirking a bit when it was probably near impossible to do. thank you for everything. always.

though i knew, we all knew, this was coming. i cannot believe that you are gone. i miss you. i love you.

xo,

Ali

life.

garden love....

















harvest love












brother love...








i. am. overwhelmed.



i am filled full of good things, like beautiful moments of reconnecting with some of my sweetest and nearest and dearest sister mama friends, love-ins all around, yummy food with the worlds best hummus and more, growing bellies, (and shrinking ones too:)) and all that good stuff. girls day centers me, puts me at peace. fills me up till i am spilling over with everything being just right. at dinner after girls day hubs said over a glass of wine,
"So, how was your visit with your soul sisters?"

all i could say was "perfect." it was exactly as i had hoped, and always is.






the mama's.






















(mini al and mini nins....chillin' and spreading the lovins)












please check out the hand on the knee. unreal.








5 0f the 7.5 dearies...














two lil guys hangin' on the steps...








but, besides the good, there is so much more going on here. i am completely overwhelmed. with kindergarten madness, preschool starts, back to work jitters, wedding stuffs, and a very sick gram, who is fighting so hard to hang on and suffering so damn much.

life feels to be a bit of a whirlwind right now. all this good, all this chaos, and all this just plain not fairness....makes my head spin a bit.


feeling the need to be re-centered. just not sure how to stay there. any ideas?

xo,

A

summer-ized

i wish that this summer might last forever.

xo,

A

my drug.

*my yarrow - in full bloom*



So i know that around this time of year i am usually chock filled with juicy deets about my garden and the beans playing in my garden, and the tasty somethin's that are growing in my garden and. and. and....however, this summer it's been a bit different. i have been saving all these sweet things, spending most evenings before the bugs come out, weeding, playing, walking around in and cherishing every plant. and keeping it to myself...want to peek?







*my lettuce*














*sun peeking through the leaves of my squash plants*



















*i had to pick just one*










*ah at last, tomatoes...SAFE tomatoes*








hubs and i made a decision that i needed a bigger garden this year, and a bigger garden i got. it is 3-4 times the size of the little one i usually tend to and i think i have been a bit overwhelmed. the weeds have been growing as fast as the plants, and the plants, although i firmly believe in organic growing, look as though they are on steroids. but alas, as the week came tumbling down last week in chaos due to some unfortunate doctors appointments with doctors simply NOT listening to me, AT ALL, and stress weighing heavily on my mind about some family situations needing to be dealt with, and the biggest bean having a less than stellar day attitude wise, i trudged out to the garden and worked away...i mean really worked, and magically, all my distress seemed to burn off in the last of the days sun. it was as though the roots of all my sweet tomato plants and cucumber vines were releasing a calming vibe through the soil in between my toes and everything seemed somehow, just. better. there was sweat dripping down my face, dirt caked under all my nails, staining the heels of my feet, and my heart was pounding, full of joy, peace, and balance. it was as though somehow, this was the answer. where i needed to be...

my knee was no longer aching and my stomach seemed momentarily calm...my energy was high, and i was hopeful.

my garden....my drug....

whats yours?













*my chicks and hens..*


xo,

A

why i rock,

as mentioned in previous post, M has had his safety town camp this week. today the fire department came. they gave them hats, badges, the whole nine yards.

M was over the moon.

so, just to be the COOLEST mom on the block, while bry was at work - i decided to make dinner, grill, as i do most nights - and catch the grill in a tremendous grease fire, with huge flames shooting out of the turned OFF grill.

that way, M could see the fire guys UP CLOSE. in OUR house. with a BIG truck blocking the road and EVERYTHING.















now tell me, don't i rock?

we are fine. dinner not.

also a lesson in why you should:

a. not allow children to run around in their underwear/diaper/bare ass because it is "almost" bath time - like in 3 hours.
b. not wait to pick the entire house up until after said children have gone to bed.
c. have a backup plan for dinner
d. DO not under any circumstance forget to get the dog frontline at the vet and instead try to tie a flea collar for cat off of the front of his collar - so that when the ENTIRE town VFD gets here and attempts to pet the dog...well, just get the damn frontline.
e. not unload the dishwasher all over the kitchen to allow dishes to "air dry" it makes you look a hot mess.
f. empty the trashes and leave all the bags in the mudroom because you are going to get the upstairs garbages - again AFTER said children are sleeping - again it makes you look a hot mess.


awesome. it. is. awesome.

but, i have gained some respect from the big man, who just asked me what we are going to do tomorrow because it is ambulance day at school.

i rock.

xo,

A